Cris’ microblog

XIV

My friend Ava published a spicy take on people who constantly change what software tools or online services they use. Before publishing it, she warned me not to feel called out. I still do, but I loved reading it nonetheless. It’s the kind of tough love that I need.

his paragraph describes my problem well:

At the same time, the view you have of yourself is ruining it too. You are constantly devaluing and putting down your past selves and what they created. You dismiss your own writing as yapping, rambling, trash. You think it’s old, it’s cringe, it’s embarrassing, it’s not deep enough, no one cares about it, it doesn’t reflect your mental space 2 weeks later, so you burn it all down. You reinvent yourself over and over like an act of shame. Believe me, your stuff is great, and if you don’t become comfortable with sitting with old thoughts that aren’t how you currently feel, you’ll repeat this no matter what tool you use.

Before that, she asked two very good questions:

Why don’t you see it through for once? Why can’t you decide on a tool and stick with it for a year or more?

Boy. I would love to do that, but can I? Can I actually resist my desperate desire to delete my blog and start from scratch for an entire year?